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What is the link between domestic violence, homelessness and the poverty of women and children? The link is not a causal one in that homelessness and poverty are root causes of domestic violence. Instead, homelessness and poverty are often the results of violence and abuse in intimate relationships. Among the dynamics of domestic violence is the concept of power and control. Some abusive partners attempt to control the women they love through violence, emotional abuse, isolation (keeping their partner all to themselves) or financial control. They attempt to manage all financial matters; controlling all the family money, taking any money a woman may earn or inhibiting her ability to work or participate in job training. Abusive partners may refuse to watch their children, withhold transportation or generally make going to work or participating in job training a stressor in her life. Partners who are jealous and worried that she might find another man may call her at work frequently or come to the workplace to assess the situation. Women report that these abuses impact their job stability. Employers are sympathetic to a point- often, a woman may lose her job if her partner constantly contacts her there. Advocates for victims of domestic violence in Delaware have expressed concern that new welfare reform regulations will be punitive to women in abusive relationships. It may be necessary for a victim to leave her job for safety reasons (need to escape from a dangerous partner) or she may lose her job because of her partner’s harassment or stalking on the job site. Experience has shown that women may leave their abusers numerous times before that are able to end the relationship. This may mean that they may need to receive public assistance longer that the two year limit allowed by the State. Women may also be viewed as non-compliant" if they are not able to maintain stability in a job or job training class which will mean a cut in benefits. In their zeal to help women become independent from their partners,welfare department economic social workers may put a victim at further risk by requiring that she end the relationship, take legal action against her partner or participate in a counseling program. Advocates have long understood that leaving a relationship is a long process and that women are most vulnerable after a separation or when their partners know that they have revealed the abuse to others. Lack of knowledge or training on the part of economic social workers may exacerbate a victims shame or low self-esteem which helps keep her trapped in the cycle of abuse. Women who do leave a relationship have a variety of needs. Frequently they do not have experience living on their own, need a steady income, child care, permanent housing, counseling and support. Women who come to shelter often find themselves homeless. The risk of returning to their former home or neighborhood is too great. Although domestic violence shelters in Delaware allow women to stay up to 60 days, it is sometimes too short a time in which to establish work, credit, day care and find affordable, safe housing. Social workers in the shelters assist women in their search by making contacts in the community but often the cost of housing is prohibitive for a first time worker. Transitional housing is provided by both of the domestic violence shelters in the state as well as by other organizations. Transitional Housing offers safety as well as the support that a victim needs when going out on her own, possibly for the first time. However, victims may have the perception that transitional housing is another shelter. Victims yearn for the opportunity to have a place of their own and to live in peace with their children. Women who are living in subsidized housing face a different problem. When their lives are in danger from an abusive partner they must often make the choice to remain there despite the fear they feel. Because of the substantial lack of affordable housing, women simply cannot take the risk of losing their housing. Housing authorities cannot move a victim quickly to a new location and a woman may attempt to keep safe by utilizing various legal remedies. A Protection from Abuse Order from Family Court can require an abusive partner to stay 100 yards from his victim. A victim can also obtain a no contact" order through a criminal charge. These legal remedies can help to protect the victim but they are still just a piece of paper which depends on the abusers ability to control his own actions. Often an abuser will violate a court order forcing the victim to return to court which means that she will probably need to miss another day of work. If this happens enough a victim’s job may be a risk. The evidence is clear that the violence in women’s lives impacts their ability to move forward and become financially independent. As long as the welfare and housing systems fail to address their special needs, families will continue in the cycle of abuse and failure. Victims of domestic violence need a multitude of supports while attempting to start over- the very basic of these is income and housing. It is time for a new paradigm in the institutional community where victims of domestic violence can be supported in their desire for financial growth and safe homes. Mary Davis is a family therapist with Child, Inc. and was one of the organizers of the Delaware Coalition for the Homeless.
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